Three months since the beginning a my new decade and I am sorry it is bloody hard. I have to keep telling myself I am growing not ageing. It’s my new mantra and I came up with it before Brene Brown.
I keep telling myself this is the decade where I have all my crap sorted and I can now rock it. Live a life of purpose and passion without giving a shit what others think!
On a good day this is true, on a great day self doubt doesn’t even enter my head and on a awesome day – unbelievably grateful and blessed.
The biggest mindset shift I have to change is “being the eldest does not matter”. I am a wisdom gatherer and sharing gems is a responsibility I take seriously. I am a shining beacon to pour light on the ageism crap that is out there. I want my daughters and younger women to think “wow – what a mover and a shaker- she is rocking it and maybe growing old is OK!
Affirmation and acknowledgement are my love language and I am simply not hearing it!! So I am putting it out there – I have not got it all worked out – I am certainly not perfect – In fact, I tossed this one down the toilet a long time ago. I am believing ’till I am achieving – not faking it ’till I make it!
Turning sixty has tripped me up and I am struggling not to fall and stay flat-lined on the ground feeling sorry for myself. Physically it is a struggle to jump back up and maybe this is the clue.
I can stay bruised and battered and let it be OK! I can feel constricted and wounded and make that OK, I can feel old and worn out and that can also feel OK. I have earned the right to stay down a little longer than I am used to – hey as I said I don’t really have a choice anyway.
Stay in the muck and don’t give a ? Still can’t write that f… word. I have earned the right to take my time and look around and know the dark is OK and it is in fact necessary. This place is familiar and sometimes it isn’t about climbing my way out as soon as possible. I definitely know I have many escape routes – I know I no longer get paralysed by fear in this place. Once I get over the shock and reassess things – yah! No cracked bones, no blood loss and no slurred speech – I can take a long, deep and slow breath and settle in on a soft bed of greenery and enjoy myself.
I learnt this lesson recently and when it was time to get up I had many hands wanting to give me a lift, caring, kind and supportive hands. In that moment I thought – they don’t actually care how old I am – they just loved seeing me say YES to the experience – they loved seeing me laugh at how comfortable my landing was and how stunningly beautiful the view was.
Simply get out of my way- this isn’t actually about me – this is about living a life of purpose and passion and at times it is OK to wonder what others think! Allow the thought and then let it pass, feel the feelings and then let them pass and get out of my way and ask for help if I need it.
BOOM – another amazing lesson of this decade – it is OK to ask for help and lesson two – I certainly don’t have to have everything worked out. Hallelujah – bring it on!
Thank you for those who commented on last weeks blog – holding hands with you is an absolute pleasure.
Lastly, I am running two workshops starting next week.
The Five Pillars of Health: A supportive group where you can take some time to check out how you want to spring clean your life as we enter the last months of 2019. Let’s go out with some clean living together.
Please reach out for information and bookings for this workshop. You can do it over six weeks or 1 day.
Love Sharleen xx