Change is in the air, certainly today as I write this blog the temperature in New Zealand has dropped dramatically. However, it is not the weather I want to focus on but more about the changes women go through at midlife. For the month of February, I will be focusing on the theme of changes because I am certain you have noticed that change and midlife go hand in hand.
Sometimes, midlife can feel like you don’t have anyone’s hand to hold and you are feeling alone, confused and overwhelmed. However, one thing I have been delighted and surprised about with my own midlife journey is how fascinating and fabulous midlife is. I am blown away with how excited I am with nearly reaching the big 60: this blows my mind! I am meeting some really inspiring 60+ women and they all say that life just keeps getting better. These women have embraced midlife and have owned who they are and who they want to be now. After a lifetime of being all things to all people they are ready to let go and fly solo because they are happy within themselves.
So yes, life is changing and if you are prepared to ride the cross roads of change, I promise you will receive many gifts. Believe me, I had to get out there with my stiletto heeled, knee high black leather boots on and walk the road. It wasn’t easy, and you can imagine how many times I nearly fell and sometimes did land in a pothole. At these times I wanted so much to race home (more like hobble home and hope no-one saw me) and slip into my holey, fluffy slippers that were comfortable, snuggly and warm. However, I can now report I mostly wear my gold sneakers and feel darn good in them. Midlife has settled down, and yes sometimes I choose the boots and sometimes the slippers, but mostly the sneakers do the trick.
Change never really goes away and when you do feel settled another change is just around the corner. I have had a massive change recently with my youngest daughter finishing secondary school. This meant 17 years of dramas, dances and dreams finished and this does not count primary school life. I was DONE and I was ready to be DONE! Believe me four teenage daughters all dancing every genre under the sun and all having their individual dramas has been exhausting and rewarding. Mothering and I had had a long conversation a while back and I decided I was ready to release the role of school mum, so I wasn’t expecting the wave of emotion that I was overcome with at Roses school graduation dinner. The enormity of saying good bye to this chapter of my life hit me like a ton of bricks just after hubby and I were doing high fives with each other and congratulating ourselves on surviving. Suddenly I felt the tears, the ache and the sadness and you know what it was OK. I felt the range of emotions and then they passed. I did this all without anyone else at the table noticing that I was slightly bi-polar.
Giving up drinking three years ago is finally paying off and I am feeling again, and it is so goooood. This journey is another blog to be written but for now I want to reassure you that midlife and change do go together. I am convinced you are experiencing a change or two right now and I would love to hear about the changes that are occupying your midlife. Please comment below and share your bi-polar moments.
If you have no-one to hold your hand, then holding hands with my clients is a specialty of mine. I will walk beside you for as long as you need me too and I will be the first to pat you on the back when you are ready to let go and if you have time to look back I will be waving joyously as you take on your next adventure. Click HERE if you would like a FREE twenty minute chat with me.
I will be back next week dissecting another change chapter of midlife.